My very first pair of jelly shoes were Stuart Weitzman.
Clear plastic maryjanes sculpted like bird’s nests with rhinestones gently
kissing the toebox like dewdrops. When I first saw them the child in me could
be heard whispering, “princess shoes!” and I knew they would be coming home with
me. I never got to wear jelly shoes as a child. My mother said they were not
good for growing feet. She saved me from all kinds of regretful fashion trends
ranging from the spandex biker shorts of the 80’s to the ruffled pirate blouses
of the early 90’s. I am thankful for those, but, unfortunately, the deprivation
of jelly shoes has resulted in an unnatural obsession with plastic shoes and handbags.
The
practicality of plastic accessories knows few boundaries. Not only does one not
have to worry about the material getting wet, plastics are easy to clean should
they be thrown up on by a baby, cat, or drunk sorority girl. And carrying such accessories out into the
public eye can leave you with the comfort of knowing that no member of PETA is
going to hunt you down in your sleep.
I recently
discovered these Missoni jelly flats on the Bloomingdales website. I find them
to be delightfully summery and object to nothing but their steep price of $250
(Really? They’re plastic shoes.). Luckily there are slightly more reasonable
options out there. One of my favorites is the BowWow (see below). A collaboration between
Moschino and Kartell (an Italian
furniture company specializing in aesthetically satiating plastic furniture),
these sweet little ballet flats have been around for a couple of years and are
available in 15 colors. They're non-toxic and recyclable. And new for this season, they’ve come out with a wedge.
Plastic
handbags have the added feature of allowing one a glimpse inside the bag, which
can be good or bad depending on your level of tidiness. Some people would
maintain that plastic bags are only for the beach, but I strongly disagree.
Last year Furla debuted their Candy Bag. I was not sure how I felt about the
texture when I finally had my hands on one in their Munich store. I ended up
passing and instead became the owner of a Jil Sander Orange Acetate Market
tote. This summer season saw the return of Furla’s doctor bag shaped candy
satchel and they’ve incorporated another of my favorite things: glitter. I don’t
know how it would be possible to frown walking around with a sparkling pink
carryall. Additionally, I am certain this bag would be a great conversation
starter with my favorite three-year old diva, Cora, an expert in all things
pink.
Unless you
wish to look like a three year old or a melted crayon box while sporting these
smile-inducing PVC accessories, I suggest you keep the styling on the
conservative side. They would be best highlighted with neutrals, but it’s not
entirely necessary to rule out contrasting colors. Take advantage of the bright
color trend we are experiencing! Just don’t overdo the colorblocking or wear
too many colors at once, unless you are interested in trying out that vomit
easy cleanup theory I mentioned earlier. Leave the rainbows to Skittles and
Lucky Charms, please. So, put your serious accessories away, and welcome in the warmer
weather with polyvinyl chloride pleasure.
Ooh, I saw those plastic faux Hermes Birkin bags (I'm a little fashion-backward but I think that's what it was modeled on) in Scotland a few years ago... All sorts of candy colors lined up in a shop window. Almost bought one. Kinda wish I had. They're something you'd rarely carry but would savor forever...
ReplyDeleteOh, my plastic things make it out of the closet quite often! I think that part of it is because I am so good at spilling things all over myself that it takes some of the worry out of my days.
ReplyDelete