My very first pair of jelly shoes were Stuart Weitzman.
Clear plastic maryjanes sculpted like bird’s nests with rhinestones gently
kissing the toebox like dewdrops. When I first saw them the child in me could
be heard whispering, “princess shoes!” and I knew they would be coming home with
me. I never got to wear jelly shoes as a child. My mother said they were not
good for growing feet. She saved me from all kinds of regretful fashion trends
ranging from the spandex biker shorts of the 80’s to the ruffled pirate blouses
of the early 90’s. I am thankful for those, but, unfortunately, the deprivation
of jelly shoes has resulted in an unnatural obsession with plastic shoes and handbags.

I recently
discovered these Missoni jelly flats on the Bloomingdales website. I find them
to be delightfully summery and object to nothing but their steep price of $250
(Really? They’re plastic shoes.). Luckily there are slightly more reasonable
options out there. One of my favorites is the BowWow (see below). A collaboration between
Moschino and Kartell (an Italian
furniture company specializing in aesthetically satiating plastic furniture),
these sweet little ballet flats have been around for a couple of years and are
available in 15 colors. They're non-toxic and recyclable. And new for this season, they’ve come out with a wedge.

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Unless you
wish to look like a three year old or a melted crayon box while sporting these
smile-inducing PVC accessories, I suggest you keep the styling on the
conservative side. They would be best highlighted with neutrals, but it’s not
entirely necessary to rule out contrasting colors. Take advantage of the bright
color trend we are experiencing! Just don’t overdo the colorblocking or wear
too many colors at once, unless you are interested in trying out that vomit
easy cleanup theory I mentioned earlier. Leave the rainbows to Skittles and
Lucky Charms, please. So, put your serious accessories away, and welcome in the warmer
weather with polyvinyl chloride pleasure.
Ooh, I saw those plastic faux Hermes Birkin bags (I'm a little fashion-backward but I think that's what it was modeled on) in Scotland a few years ago... All sorts of candy colors lined up in a shop window. Almost bought one. Kinda wish I had. They're something you'd rarely carry but would savor forever...
ReplyDeleteOh, my plastic things make it out of the closet quite often! I think that part of it is because I am so good at spilling things all over myself that it takes some of the worry out of my days.
ReplyDelete