Friday, June 28, 2013

It's Fashion Friday!: Exercise Caution When Choosing Exercise Wear

From what I know of
trying on things at Lululemon,
I guarantee these are see through.
  I was driving through town the other day and it was raining. It's been raining off and on pretty much all week. I saw a man running on the sidewalk. It's unusual to see people on the sidewalks in my town, as it is not really very walker friendly. I was shocked more by his attire choices, however, than by his existence in space and time. Not only was this man running shirtless, which I find somewhat rude, assuming, and inappropriate (he certainly didn't bother to ask if I wanted to look at his unclothed, middle-aged, drippy, booby torso - I would have said no thanks, I'm all set), but he was barefoot! No socks, no shoes, NOTHING. I find this to be a bad idea for many reasons including but not limited to: rusty nails, broken glass, dog poop, vagrant insects, teenage boys' hocked loogies (spelling? anyone?), MRSA, unknown flesh eating bacteria, need I go on? Running barefoot on the beach is one thing. The ocean has natural cleansing mechanisms. Your local town's dirty sidewalks DO NOT. For crying out loud, buy some of those ridiculous Vibram feet or a pair of Nike sneakers. There's so little to Nike sneakers anymore, you might as well not have shoes on. He probably thought he was exercising his feet all the while only exercising great stupidity.
          It's remarkable how off people's intuition can be about what is a wise choice for something to wear to exercise the body. I don't know if I've ever told you about this one woman at my gym - she wears tight white pants that have fake black pockets on the back, no underwear, and a black sports bra that has a giant keyhole cutout in the front to show off the cleavage of her surgically enhanced titties. It's not so much the outfit I have a problem with, it's the fact that I can tell she has no underwear on from twenty feet away. There's a fine line between choosing something that doesn't make you uncomfortable and something that doesn't make everyone else uncomfortable. The hot yoga room is a very dangerous place where this is concerned. Some people get the idea that since it is hot in there, they should do like the song and take all their clothes off. Since I chose to go to bed last night instead of stay up and write, I will now redirect you to a blog on Recovering Yogi with some guidelines for how to avoid turning yoga into ho-ga. (Let's see how many words I can nonchalantly hyphenate with the "ho" prefix by the end of the year, shall we?)

Of hot pants and pink bikinis in the hot room

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